His Masterpiece

I'm taking a break from my study in Romans in this blog, as I was looking through my previous blogs for mistakes, and grammar errors, I came to notice how serious my writing is. Yes, there is a time to be serious, there’s a time to be silly, there’s a time to laugh, a time to cry, a time to rejoice. Ecclesiastes 3 speaks of this. Which brought to my attention, why do I feel I have to be serious when I speak of God’s word, his word is such a joyous thing yet in my writings it seems to cloud that. I actually don’t think it’s the subject that sets the tone in which I write. I came to the conclusion it’s me, in whatever writing I have it is always in such a serious tone. I know truly it’s because I’m hiding behind this “mask” the only time I feel like I’m being taken in all seriousness is through my writing. I feel like people don’t truly see me as who I am, it’s not their fault either, how can they not misjudge me when I misrepresent myself by hiding underneath what’s not truly me.

One of the focal causes I see myself flawed in is the way I let myself appear to others. My dissatisfaction with myself is obvious from the way I dress, to the way I hold myself, but to me the biggest factor is makeup it’s become a bit of a security blanket for me since middle school. I’m not sure if this is a relatable topic, but the reason why I see it as a dilemma is because it was made to enhance features, not cover, cloud, and clobber its way over them to create something so fake.

The real masterpiece is what’s underneath, what Gods work of art truly is. I of course have many other bad habits, and dependencies  on other unnecessary things, but this one hit me today, because how can I expect people to see me for who I truly am on the inside if I can’t let them see me who how I truly am on the outside. I’ve let looks and appearance ruin me and destroy my self esteem. I’m not telling people to not take care of themselves I’m simply saying, don’t let appearance become your number one priority, looks fade but your heart doesn’t shift as easily if its firmly planted in God. I think I’m going to begin a new chapter and ease up on the makeup as much as possible. So when I wake up in the morning my first intention is spend time in devotion rather than going with a pessimistic outlook and thinking that God made a mistake on the way He made me so I’ll waste an hour fixing all my “flaws”. I should rejoice God for every curve, freckle, and hair He put on me, I am beautiful both outwardly most importantly inwardly.

The other thing, I use makeup as a security blanket for I feel like people take me more seriously for some reason I feel as if I fill more grown up, and they don’t see the child in me. I can describe my personality as bubbly but I love being taken serious, I love smiling, but I love a good debate, I love reasoning, I love working. For some reason I feel as if without makeup people take me for as a child, I feel like the picture posted above of me on the right is the girl I want to show everyone on the left is the girl I am hiding who God really made her.

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” Psalm 139:13-16

God made you exactly the way your suppose to be, he didn’t miss one detail, he didn’t make one flaw. Remember that daily. You are His beautiful masterpiece 

side note: yes those are real tears, and surprisingly really hard to capture on camera. I promise I'm not "emo",(I was just trying to show an illustration) I seriously can just open a birthday card that a family member wrote me and start crying I absolutely love things that are sentimental and come from the heart, every year I have to prepare myself for my birthday in case my grandfather writes me a card. I'm just like him, we always both cry about cards:)